Whatever He Tells You

I stood there, exasperated. All I was doing was staying in one place because all I had was one job—stand there and be available. This was alright for one time, but I had been told to do this for every shift so far. My reason for being in Austria at a Christian conference center this summer was to serve people—not just stand there. 

Our big moment had arrived with the first group from Germany. This was what all of us volunteers from different places around the globe had been training and preparing for all week. I was ready to roll up my sleeves and get busy serving. My skills from my job back home were ready to be put to good use—hospitality was my jam. Being a part of the dining crew at the conference center fit me like a hand in a glove. 

Day one had begun with an intense breakfast shift of gaining our footing and getting our feet wet with this first group. While we didn’t serve the guests cafeteria style for breakfast, we realized it still required “all hands on deck.” 

Lunch shift came, and with it our first chance to serve food to the guests. I was excited for the chance not only to serve them, but to interact with these people through dishing food. 

Our whole dining team was on shift now, which was a good thing given the size of this group. As we completed laying out the food table, I eagerly asked our department lead what food she wanted me to serve. My excited eagerness was doused with cold water when she responded, “I want you to stand over there and be available.”

I retreated to the gestured spot like a puppy with its tail between its legs. We needed all the hands we could get to keep the line moving, yet all I was told to do was just stand there! Frustrated and a bit jealous as I watched the other girls get assigned serving the various foods, I did as I was told and stood there. 

In this frame of mind, it was easy to forget what my face was doing, so I would have to snap back to attention and put a smile back in place. If I had learned anything in my experience in hospitality, it was always to be aware of keeping a smile and an outward composure of calm. If this was my assigned job, I was going to do it right.

By dinner shift, that smile was harder to come by when once again, I was instructed to “stand there and be available.” My frustration and confusion grew. While I was used to this in hospitality, in this particular setting it just felt awkward and useless standing there and watching the others scrambling to serve the endless line. And even worse; watching that line wait and wait while they watched me just watch them back. 

The next day was played on repeat of the previous day. Except now it wasn’t just the problem of the smile I had to keep on, but the tears I had to hold back. Exasperation blanketed me. My mind argued, “I didn’t come all the way to Austria just to stand here, I came to work and serve!”

This just didn’t seem fair—why was it always me who was told to stand there while the other girls actually got to take part in the work? 

Through the haze of my thoughts, the Lord gently pulled in my attention and reminded me that I was there to do whatever I was told to do, even if that meant just standing there. If I was told to stand there every day, then I’d better stand there every day—and better do it with a genuine smile on my face too.

“Okay Lord, I’m here to do whatever is required of me. That’s what I’m here to do, even if it’s not the kind of serving I thought it would look like.” If standing here and being available to the guests was what I was told to do, then I would do my utmost best while smiling at every person—even if I just wanted to find a closet and have a good cry. 

Eventually I was able to serve food to the guests, but I remembered that lesson and those first few days of frustration that God used to give me a “heart check.” While my heart was in the right place with the desire to serve others, my heart had been bent on what I thought that should look like. 

“But Martha was distracted with much serving. And she went up to him and said, "Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Tell her then to help me." But the Lord answered her, "Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, but one thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her."”

Luke 10:40-42 ESV

In my case, I was concerned with all those who were getting to serve and the fact that I wasn’t. While I shared Martha’s desire to just serve the Lord and others, I also missed the better portion. In both cases, our desires were good, but they weren't the best. 

Our service means nothing if Jesus doesn’t first and foremost have our adoration. True service flows from following Him—not bringing Him along in our agendas. If we do not serve at His feet, we might as well not serve at all. 

“His mother said to the servants, "Do whatever he tells you."”

John 2:5 ESV

When the wine ran out at the wedding in Cana, Jesus’ mother told the servants to do whatever Jesus told them to do. This involved filling six very large stone water jars to the brim. Those servants were probably walking back and forth filling those water jars in sheer confusion. “Like this is going to actually help.” 

In the end it’s not about the what but the how. How was I serving? Was it at Jesus’ feet in love and adoration, or in anxiety and frustration because “whatever He tells you” does not look like what I think it should?

I am finding myself in that kind of season right now. Often I will feel as if I’m once again assigned to just “stand there” while I see so much work to be done for God. My desire is to go out and take part in international missions, yet at the moment, I have been assigned to “stand there and be available.” Recently, while pouring out my heart and my desire for international missions to the Lord, I questioned why the doors still weren’t opening. 

Once again, my instructions came clearly: “stand there and be available.” 

The question now is, how am I going to respond? Will I see this season as one of immobility and uselessness, or will I instead see it as a call to rest in Him and open my hands to receive His goodness?

Towards the end of my time in Austria, my department lead had told me how she appreciated and enjoyed having me on the dining crew, but that my only problem was overworking! This can often be the same problem in my service to God—I am so eager to serve Him and do great and many things for Him, while all He really wants from me is to stop overworking and just stand there and enjoy Him. 

As I was reminded in Austria that I was there to do whatever I was told, this is true of my life as well. I am here to do whatever He tells me, and if that is to stand here right now in this season and be available to Him, I will do so gladly with a genuine smile on my face.

“You have said, "Seek my face." My heart says to you, "Your face, Lord, do I seek."”

Psalm 27:8 ESV